Carb Preoccupation

I love the Ultimate Diet 2.0 for this basic reason.....it works for me. I feel it is definitely doable. I can eat low calorie and relatively low carb Monday thru Thursday and then eat ridiculously high carb Friday and Saturday and often times Sunday. I have continued to lose fat on this program without losing muscle or my mind. But there are a few concerning things that linger in the back of my head about this particular diet:

1. I think too much about my carb load days during the week. I start to obsess over high carb foods that I will partake in over the weekend.
2. It is becoming easier and easier to eat 800-1000 grams of carbs
3. I have a tendency to obsess over certain highly processed terrible food choices such as Lucky Charms
4. I am having feelings of guilt and shame after eating the higly processed foods. I refused to log my food this past weekend because of this (wow......I am becoming a closet eater)
5. I maintain relative discipline through the week only to find I lose my mind over the weekend and my discipline goes out the door.

But the reward is this....I am losing fat while maintaining my muscle. But at the same time, I am concerned that my intense focus of food as a reward for my 4-5 days of low carb eating and training will lead to some type of eating disorder because of my extremist personality.....all or nothing.

Devil Annette tells me, ahhhh don't worry about this psych hocus pocus....look girl you are getting results! Angel Annette tells me...no Annette, what about the balance you are seeking. Aren't we working on balance in all areas of your life? And think about the processed yuk you are putting in your body. A box of Lucky Charms is insane Annette and not good for you. Devil Annette tells me.....EAT THE DAMN LUCKY CHARMS! You will be alright! You do have balance in the fact that you are not eating a box of Lucky Charms every day. Monday through Thursday you are eating fine! It balances in the end Annette. Angel Annette says, don't listen to devil Annette. She is so self-serving and lives for the now...the reward which can have later consequences in the future. Annette, you stated earlier you have kinda become a closet eater on the weekends right? How healthy is that? Doesn't that make you feel bad and what kind of example are you to the readers of your blog and your kids. Devil Annette says, whatever...look at you. You are a great example, just keep doing what you are doing and simply stop living in the closet on the weekends. You need a diet and lifestyle that you can live with, it looks like you found it....SHUT UP ANGEL ANNETTE YOU EXTREMIST GOODIE TWO SHOES!

It is Wednesday and I am dreaming about my carb load on Friday. I plan to make a sweet potato casserole that is relatively low fat. I plan to post everything that I eat.... I don't want to be a closet eater...even if it shames me haha. I will work on my balance but will not make any promises about being good over the weekend. When I say I will be good and eat low fat on the weekend, that usually becomes a high fat weekend. If I don't promise a thing, it is better. Go figure.

Tonite I plan to do some simple cardio. The good ole stairmaster.